the ability to walk through your clothes

The ability to teleport 0.00000000000000007 seconds in the past

the power to kiss your own ass

To be able to go to the future but only at 1 second per second.

The power to teleport, but only to life threatening situations.

The power to view pointless superpowers on a screen.

The power to make the key on your keyboard not work

understanding every language only if you get insulted

the power to play a flute to summon a black leprechaun but only when your on the verge of passing out

The power to teleport homeless people to the sun

the power to teleport to the center of the earth

the power to make thin air that is harmless

The power to make you`re erections so big you faint.

the power to find a needle in a haystack

The ability to produce snot twenty times faster than normal.

The ability to be bulletproof after you get shot.

Incredible Slothman. The power to move slowly.

The power to float in water, and then sink sometimes.

The power to eat food.

The power to Google "Google".

The power to sharpen mechanical pencils and pens.

The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a chi...ldren's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

The power to change different colours depending on you feel.

The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!