the ability to grow a boner to an incredible size but only when you are asked to come up to the front of the class

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The Power To Fly Without control

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The power to control karma. Moral: Karma is a BlTCH! MY BlTCH!

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The ability for your penis to tie itself into a knot.

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The power of even having a pointless superpower.

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The power to teleport all gold to criminals and or teleport criminals to gold

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The power to look at someone and imaginatively initiate intercourse in the most unreasonable way possible.

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The power to switch any physical traits with your own reflection in the mirror.

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The ability to teleport into a wall

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The power to walk on water for 1 second and then fall in

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The power to recharge batteries by licking them.

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The power to taste food 3 seconds before they eat it.

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The power to experience hair loss at accelerated rate.

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_/?\_ (?`_´) SON GET IN THE SCOUT TANK WE'RE KILLING THE SCAMMERS

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The ability to go forward in time at will.

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the power to lower my blood presure to dangerous levels

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The power to sharpen mechanical pencils and pens.

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The power to grab a cup of purple drank, Then drink it

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The power to have explosive diarrhea when people are looking at you.

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The power to summon anything you hate. Moral: Relax I hate morals too, if you ever find a moral here, then its not the original guy.

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The power to be the best video game player ever but you have squeakers follow you everywhere calling you a hacker and saying there going to report you

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the power to turn into a fish that is less then one mm small while only on land

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The power to be great at math but forget how to breathe.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!