the power to get a 100" erection but only over your dead greatgrandma

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The power to die, and you can only do it once.

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The power to not get shit dick

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The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

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the power of being yourself

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The ability to turn into a werewolf but only when your holding silver

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The power to walk on frozen water.

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The power to produce fingernails at will that people can eat.

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The power to turn yourslef into a suicide bomber just as he blows himself up

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the ability to self resurrect only if you are not dead

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The ability to know what time it is when looking at a working clock.

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The power to make my own sandwich

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The power to get hard at will.

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The power to hold the floor down using gravity.

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The power to vomit through your anus.

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the superpower to turn into a chicken in a processing plant

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The power to erase anything written in pencil

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The power to jump higher than a speeding bullet and run faster than a tall building.

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the power to jerk off

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The ability to do moderately well on an exam while sharting next to your crush.

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the power to say the power to say the power to say the power to say.....

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The power to know what card is on top of a deck, but only when it's an 8 of diamonds.

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The power to eat nails and crap broken glass.

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The power to lower the temperature in the room but only if you're cold

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!