The power of drawing perfects dog dicks, but not dogs at all.

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The power to quit smoking 5 times in a week.

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The ability to shoot apples, but they disintegrate in mid-air. Also, the apples are tiny.

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The power to have to eat every 1 second.

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The power to grow increasingly warm fur as your body temperature rises.

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The power to break your legs before hitting the ground after jumping off of heights

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The power to phase through walls, but only when you're in an airplane.

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The power to sit on a pile of change and add it up.

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The power to move microscopic specks of dust, but only one at a time, and only a few times a year.

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The power to throw-up purple cheese curds on command, but you are also allergic to purple cheese curds?

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the power to fly while under water

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having the same super powers as batman!

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the power to shit your pants uncontrollably when your mom calls your name

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The power to type good morals under your comments. Moral: Ever seen me post an actual moral (even less a GOOD one?) Pssh! There is no such thing as good, not that I am aware of at least >:)

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The power of immortality while suicidal.

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The power to learn anything very quickly but to forget all knowledge of what you've learnt 3 seconds later.

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The power to remember anyone's birthday unless you are at their birthday party.

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el poder de leer "google" en cualquier idioma

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The power to give other people superpowers, but you can't give them to yourself.

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The power to become a lime only when you're left nipple brushes against your left shoe whilst it is superglued to your ding dong and you're strapped to a bed naked in the woods.

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The power to telekinetically pick your nose and eat it.

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The power to have omniscience but can't speak and have Alzheimer's.

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The power to party like it is 1999 despite it being 2011

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The ability to speak any language, but only to people who do not understand said language you speak.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!