The power to realize that at least half of the top ten "powers" are yours, and you don't know if you are proud or ashamed of having so little to do... On the bright side, you don't sign them like some other douches...

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the power to fall off of a cliff and live... in hell

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the power to see through water.

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Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

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The power to wake up and live through school....

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The power to be doing something else then typing a pointless power

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The superpower of being the only one without powers in the world where everyone has powers.

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The power to be powerless in situations u need them the most.

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The power to believe that the only way is essex.

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The ability to say YOLO without getting shot.

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The power to hear peoples thoughts, only when you're deaf

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The power to tell a joke with no moral. Moral: There is no moral.

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the power to transform into pedobear with diplomatic immunity...

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The power to inhale beverages through your genitals.

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the ability to not get pregnant when you get raped

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the power to make the vagina taste like pizza (p u s s y flavored)

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The power to age 2% faster every time you see the color purple.

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The power to sleep with your eyes open but you still can't see what's going on

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The power to press the "I have read and agree with the terms on service -" button without actually reading them.

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The power to instantly kill yourself

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The power to blink your eyelids in Morse Code

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The power to believe people will vote for you`re comment, which starts WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY in the back.

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The ability to smell colors

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to be able to lift any weight of feathers

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!