The power to die when you do Anything!!!

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The power to type 1,000 words per minute, but only on a 12 key tracphone ®

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The power to look at Chuck Norris. I dare you to try.

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The power to uncontrollably make your clothes dissapear and only in church.

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the power to-OMFG IT'S TAILS DOLL!

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the power to commit crime.

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The power to turn into a sloth at random times.

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The ability to teleport at a random point of the space.

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The power to understand that Jesus called himself Son of man, which translates into Anderson, which makes a certain movie make a bit more sense. Moral: THIS IS MY WORLD MISTER ANDERSON! MY WOOOOOORLD!

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The power to change your eye colour but you are the only one who can see the difference.

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the power to fly for a second

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The Power To Grow Potatoes from your hair

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The ability to heat up an object by 1 degree for every week you hold it.

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The power to have every single power you can imagine but not able to use any of them

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?u?op ?p?sdn ?d?? o? ???od ???

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Oye sun teri ma ka saki na ka

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The power to speed up wallmart lines; only if your're not in it.

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The power to never be burned, but only when underwater.

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The power to lose your genitals when you masturbate or have sex

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Useless super power? A shitbag (my former boss, now my employee, funny story really) at work heard I have diabetuus and started lecturing me in the meeting room in front off everybody as how sugar was bad, and that I should not drink artificial sugar and sodas and... ...Anyway he refused to shut up and had (back then) the guts to point at me and shout "SHUT UP I AM LECTURING YOU!" And continued "avoid juice and whatnot... ...Then I had enough bullshit for one day, slammed him against the wall and shouted: ITS DIABETES TYPE ONE QUEERFAG! I WAS BORN WITH IT ITS CALLED BREATHMINTS MOTHERFUKKER! Point: He called the cops and made up a lot of lies about me such as: "rhe one where I made him FEEL afraid for his life etc" which my former coleagues comfirmed where not true at all. then he called his boss in order to get me fired, his boss contacted me, we spoke, my former boss/"lecturer" got demoted, now two years later I got promoted to his former position... ...Before I left work yesterday, I grabbed my insuline pen and stuck it in my tigh and asked him/it:remember about that time you lectured me about diabetes?"... Funny story really, you should all have been there.

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The power to summon a Genie lamp, that if rubbed allows you to wish for 3 pointless superpowers.

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The power to shoot pencils out of your mouth every 10 seconds

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THE POWER TO TYPE IN ALL CAPS

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The power to conjure chairs at will.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!