The power to give yourself a sinus infection

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The ability to watch an episode of 60 minutes in 59 minutes

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The power to handle the truth. Moral: Truth is in the eye of the beholder, I AM THE ONE AND ONLY BEHOLDER!

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The ability to teleport, but only into solid stone.

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the super power to remove your super power

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The power to fart really smelly :P

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the power to read 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 books every second

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to be able to lift any weight of feathers

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the power to sing like justin bieber

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The ability to suddenly realize you have Cancer.

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The power to get AIDS.

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the power to... SHUT THE F*CK UP

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The power to have any pointless power you want

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The power to exude spaghetti from your pockets, which is never stopped. The spaghetti keeps coming. Out of your pockets. Spaghetti everywhere.

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Q: What is 1+1? A: An equation.... Duh...

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The ability to speak all languages ever recorded in history, but cannot speak without using at least 10 of them simultaneously.

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The power to shoot flames from your hands, only its not really warm.

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The power to become annoyed by annoying people

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The power to fly but only if you standing on the ground

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The power to summon a Genie lamp, that if rubbed allows you to wish for 3 pointless superpowers.

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The power to get foot-boners

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The ability to anticipate the release of half-life three. Sidenote: Goes hand in hand with the ability to bathe in your own tears.

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The power to be Helen Keller at will.

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The power to become an extremely attractive straight man in only the presence of 83 year old homosexual men

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!