the power to absorb other superpower, but no one have superpower

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The power to not be affected by bullets unless you are shot with one by a gun

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The power to shorten your lifespan by 10 seconds.

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The power to take control of mentally disabled turtles.

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The power to have the money to buy anything in the world, however you only have enough money to pay for the price of the object and not the taxes.

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Being Aquaman

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The power to take your groceries from your car to your house in two trips or less.

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The power to greatly enlarge your penis only if you are presenting.

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The power to sleep if your not awake

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My charms is my superpower, but damn I cant shut up after spending some quality time with the ladies! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! MY BODY WAS NOT READY! I feel like yelling out my real name, but you know, if you know me (I am easily recognizable) the girls I spend time with would feel like I am bragging about them, and I am not, I am simply celebrating my conquest, you see, you came, you saw... BUT I CONQUERED! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT Moral: Feel free to thumb this down, my superpowers need to be contained, or else I will beep my way to an early grave! Girls, mwah... and you know, just dodge the kiss if you cant handle love personified, they arent homing nor anything... Should I ask my doctor if she has any medications that will help me wire down after uh... Multiple female company? HAHAHAHAAAAAAH!... The thought made me kinda sad, im better, now just to prove to my company here that I got balls of steel, I am gonna post this and let you judge me all you want! BECAUSE YOU CANT HAVE EM!

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the super power to remove your super power

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The power to fart really smelly :P

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The power to have the biggest boner ever in the middle of a presentation.

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the power to read 9999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 books every second

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The ability to lactate air.

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The power to turn pizza into math worksheets. -Big C

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The ability to suddenly realize you have Cancer.

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the power to-OMFG IT'S TAILS DOLL!

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The power to get AIDS.

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The power to turn your head 360 degrees

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the power to laugh at something that isn't even funny

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Ingesting caffeine gives you the power to be a normal, competent human being.

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the ability to slightly change your facial expression. sometimes.

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The power to exude spaghetti from your pockets, which is never stopped. The spaghetti keeps coming. Out of your pockets. Spaghetti everywhere.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!