The power to speed up wallmart lines; only if your're not in it.

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The power to get hurt every other hour

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The ability to have 20/20 vision... only when wearing glasses.

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the power make the left half of your body invisible.

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The power to summon a Genie lamp, that if rubbed allows you to wish for 3 pointless superpowers.

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The power of Being stupid

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the power to add .1 mile to the odometer of nearby vehicles

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The power to run at the slowest speed possible.

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the power to not own a spacial power!!

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The power to make mediocre cabbage soup.

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The power to transform into a vegetable, but only one way

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The power to shorten your lifespan by 10 seconds.

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The power to have the money to buy anything in the world, however you only have enough money to pay for the price of the object and not the taxes.

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the power to be as dumb as george bush and as useless as barrak obama

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the power to freeze time by 10 seconds but in the process freeze yourself too - mleo1

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The ability to watch an episode of 60 minutes in 59 minutes

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The power to realize that your personality is like a shithole.

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The power to take your groceries from your car to your house in two trips or less.

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The power to greatly enlarge your penis only if you are presenting.

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The power to instantly kill yourself

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My charms is my superpower, but damn I cant shut up after spending some quality time with the ladies! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! MY BODY WAS NOT READY! I feel like yelling out my real name, but you know, if you know me (I am easily recognizable) the girls I spend time with would feel like I am bragging about them, and I am not, I am simply celebrating my conquest, you see, you came, you saw... BUT I CONQUERED! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT Moral: Feel free to thumb this down, my superpowers need to be contained, or else I will beep my way to an early grave! Girls, mwah... and you know, just dodge the kiss if you cant handle love personified, they arent homing nor anything... Should I ask my doctor if she has any medications that will help me wire down after uh... Multiple female company? HAHAHAHAAAAAAH!... The thought made me kinda sad, im better, now just to prove to my company here that I got balls of steel, I am gonna post this and let you judge me all you want! BECAUSE YOU CANT HAVE EM!

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the super power to remove your super power

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The power to have the biggest boner ever in the middle of a presentation.

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The power to have wood when you wake up.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!