The power to stop reading this. Or the power to live forever but only if you never ate BACON !

thumb_up thumb_down +168

The power to have consensual sex with any dog of your choice.

thumb_up thumb_down +140

The power of being mysterious. Terribly mysterious. And possibly being capable of cutting guns in half with one's mind.

thumb_up thumb_down +94

The power to make everyone yawn in the room when you yawn.

thumb_up thumb_down +66

the power to make ads 0.000001 seconds shorter

thumb_up thumb_down +60

The power to shit purple butterflies.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

The power to shapeshift into a worm.

thumb_up thumb_down +52

The power to hear everything in pig-Latin.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

The Pickle Touch- That is, the power to pickle any object by merely touching it.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

The ability to lead millions into committing mass genocide, proceeding this by killing yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

The power to kill yourself when you are dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

The ability to crap out acid once every month.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

The power to change the channel of the television every 2 hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

The power to possess every pointless superpower and be tasked with saving the world.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

The power to come back to life but only after u die

thumb_up thumb_down +32

the ability to kill people with your mind as long as they are dead

thumb_up thumb_down +28

the power to eat a ridiculous amount of bagels

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The Power to glow in the dark during day time only.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The power to permanently grow huge wonderful extremely heavy dragon wings, which do nothing but to weight you down and stand in the way. Fly? Nope, in fact you cant even walk now.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The power to know the answer of what is the purpose of life only after death.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The Power of shitting by your mouth

thumb_up thumb_down +20

the power to be able to shoot death lazers but only at people you want alive

thumb_up thumb_down +18

The power to Silence everyone when they're saying anything

thumb_up thumb_down +14

The power to communicate with inter-dimensional beings, but they're reeeeally annoying.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!