The power to shit purple butterflies.

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The power to hear everything in pig-Latin.

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The power to piss with REALLY high force.

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The power to remember your past failures and all the pain you ever received every time you close your eyes. And you have no appossable thumbs.

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the ability to taste the difference of 3 types of cheeses

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The power to see red in a slightly lighter shade

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The power to speak Spanish, but only to people who do not speak Spanish.

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The power to instantaneously teleport in front of your mom each time you masturbate.

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The power to fly but only in a room with a ceiling fan

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The power to suck deez nuts

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The ability to fly only as fast as you can walk.

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The power to cough, but only at funerals, and speeches

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Good News Everyone! You have the power to read this is my voice!

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The ability to float sideways very slowly

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The power to see what a person is wearing.

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Being able to temporarily lift 10x what you can typically lift while simultaneously having the power that everything you touch immediately becomes 10x heavier.

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The Power to glow in the dark during day time only.

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The power to forget why you got hurt when you get hurt.

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The power to walk after about 6 months of age.

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TyPiNg In LoWeR aNd CaPs To AnNoY oThErS

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the power to create a meme

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The power of funk, but only on Tuesdays between 2 and 3 AM.

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The Power Above This Power During Night time. The Power Below This Power During the day. Invulnerable for one second during dawn and dusk.

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the power to immediately become gay after beginning to feel attracted to a member of the opposite sex & then once you are attracted to a member of the same sex you become straight.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!