The power to strap a bomb on your chest, walk into a crowded area, and detonate it

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The power to have superhuman strength. But I have to jack off to do so.

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The power to change the channel with your mind, but only to the Weather Network.

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The power of being able to fly, but only on February 30th.

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having superpowers during the inquisition

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The power to die at any moment you want.

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The ability to control the universe everytime you lick your own elbow!

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The power to smell everyone's crap from anywhere you go

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The power to sneeze scissors

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The power to walk over crisp packets 25% more quietly than the average person

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The power to lift any weight but only when you're lifting something light.

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The power of love

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The power to jump, but only on the ground.

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The ability to have all your dreams be nightmares that you remember vividly.

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The power to be superman on a planet without a sun

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The super power to do something pointless when you can be doing something pointless

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The power to be jelous of your friend's new sports car

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The power to slap the thigh and ride the wave :P

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The power to do get 100% in a christian studies exam, but fail everything else.

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The power to sing but your mute

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The power to identify a senior citizen by looking at their naked butt.

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The power to be able to see through clothes, but only men over the age of 65.

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the power to make ads 0.000001 seconds shorter

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The power of destroying anything that's inert with one punch, but dying afterwards.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!