Being able to fly.... in the water.

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The ability to turn traffic lights red in your lane and green for everyone else

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The power to stretch your tounge but it can only curve in a way that it only get inside your anus.

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The power to eat soup with a fork

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the ability to jump up absurd down. Without your feet leaving the ground.

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the super power of being a housewife..

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The power to have consensual sex with any dog of your choice.

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The power to turn wine into water

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The power to turn your knee any shade of orange on every full moon.

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The power to fly, but only while your feet are touching the ground.

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the power to turn star wars figurines into sticky notes, only on sunday afternoons

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The power to have the confidence to ask anyone out but always get rejected.

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The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

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Super strength, but the only thing it affects is feathers.

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The power to decrease the number of thumbs up by how long the joke was written.

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The power to look at huge breasts and avoid thinking about it.

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The power to make everyone you touch see nothing but porn

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the power to waste time doing stupid stuff like reading this.

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The power to get older every second

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The power to shit purple butterflies.

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The power to breath in lava, If you don't burn.

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The power to transform into yourself.

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The power of being able to say, yell or do anything at all without nobody bothering... ever again...

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The power to piss with REALLY high force.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!