I have the power to make /b sarcastic, witty and funny.

thumb_up thumb_down +155

The power of being able to rotate in non-rotatable chairs.

thumb_up thumb_down +133

The ability to predict what will appear on ReCaptcha, SOLVEmedia, and all that stuff, before you see it.

thumb_up thumb_down +107

the power to be phone

thumb_up thumb_down +95

Your average Axel entering a Phone Booth and coming out as... MORAL MAN! Moral: Where the damn do you find a Phone booth nowadays?

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to be wet and not know it.

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The power to be able to have intercourse with every girl you want, while being the most gay man alive..

thumb_up thumb_down +55

The power to resist trolling.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The power to turn into Patrick Star permenently and be dumb as him.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

The power to feel lustful when watching My Little Pony Clopfic.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to make your penis able to go through any nown material in the universe even a dwarf star. However it is 1000x more sensitive to pain than normal. And once you start you can't stop until it's trough.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

the power that makes your ass turn into a shit machine gun, but you can only use it if its directed at your mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The ability to pee freshly-made Japanese rice noodles.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

The power to teleport anywhere you want, but you need another guy with the same power.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

the power to hear a dog whistle

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The power to control Rollie pollies

thumb_up thumb_down -3

the ability to know if a video game sucks just by looking at the name

thumb_up thumb_down -9

The power to instantly waste all your money on cheap mango chutney at will.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

the power to create Snyder films. xD

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Having the ability to drink bleach and not die. You only get really sick.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

The power to speak any language, provided that no one around you can understand it.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The power to look extremely attractive, only when ugly people are looking at you

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The power to jump only one centimeter high.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

The ability to know everything about knowing nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!