The power to make guns appear in the hands of people who are enraged at you.

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The power of super sonic strength and speed only when you resite Shakespeare.

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The superpower to be able to blend in with trees when there are no trees in a 5 km radius

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to run super fast but every minute you have to pee

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the power to shoot lasers that are invisible and do nothing

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The power to increase the rate of plant and fungal matter growth by 15% by staring intently at it.

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The power to stop time for 1 second

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The power to control your own mind.

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The power to develop a cancerous tumor anywhere in your body at any time you want.

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the ability to turn a banana into an apple at will, but only for a few seconds.

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the power to say i can bend you

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The ability to see into the past at variable times between 1 and 30 seconds but be incapable of seeing the present.

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The power to LEROOOOY JEEEEENKINS

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The power to do get 100% in a christian studies exam, but fail everything else.

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the ability to not get pregnant when you get raped

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The power to see every rainbow in double rainbow.

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The power to turn wine into water

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The power to meme 20% harder

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The power to realize that your personality is like a shithole.

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The power to shoot poop balls when you masterbate.

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The power to see through windows

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The ability to print random memes on their tongue, but it has to be one that everyone in the room has seen before.

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The power to have explosive diarrhea involuntarily but only on dinners with your date and his/her parents.

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The ability to be frequently run over by an invisible car.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!