The power to time travel to the present.

thumb_up thumb_down +135

The power to perpetually yawn.

thumb_up thumb_down +109

The ability to predict what will appear on ReCaptcha, SOLVEmedia, and all that stuff, before you see it.

thumb_up thumb_down +107

The power to fart flames

thumb_up thumb_down +107

the power to-OMFG IT'S TAILS DOLL!

thumb_up thumb_down +81

The power to see through clothes of women 70+.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The power to have the confidence to ask anyone out but always get rejected.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The power to sweat blood uncontrollably out of your anus while singing to Justin Beiber and stabbing yourself in the dick with a machete

thumb_up thumb_down +73

turn green traffic light in red but only on your road

thumb_up thumb_down +71

The power to create wifi but only on the third Sunday of May every million decades

thumb_up thumb_down +67

the power to waste time doing stupid stuff like reading this.

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The power to turn all of the air into a solid.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

The power to pee out your butt and poop out of your weenie

thumb_up thumb_down +61

*The power to fall, but only when you trip.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The power to die

thumb_up thumb_down +61

The ability to open electronics-packaging without scissors.

thumb_up thumb_down +49

The power to understand irony.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

The power to be socially impenetrive.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

THE POWER TO FUCK ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU SUCK

thumb_up thumb_down +33

The power to unwillingly turn into a girl when you have sex with your girlfriend or turn into a guy when you have sex with your boyfriend.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

The power to fuck everyone.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

The power to: tell your women make a sandwich!

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to win the lottery, but only the december 21 of 2012.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

The power to poop kittens with mittens

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!