the power to stuff 7 jumbo marshmallows in your mouth and say chubby bunny

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The power for the left side of your body to be able to fly, but not the right.

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The ability to fire a gun with precision accuracy. But only if your the target

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The power to change the channel with your mind, but only to the Weather Network.

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The power to autocorrect without using autocorrect.

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THE POWER TO XLEAN UP STUFF WITH YOUR SUPER STRONG PUNCH

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the power to tell when someone is in your car

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The power to run into a brick wall with an erection and breaking your nose.

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The power to never have sex....jack.

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the power to disintegrate toilette paper with your butt

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Power to make other people rich.

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The power to fly into the sun.

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The power to give automatically give all your money to a Nigerian businessman for a special investment opportunity

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To Shoot Piss Out Of Your Mouth Only If You Are Taking A Dump

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Power to stop a moving oslating fan from moving.

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The power to piss out of your ass and shit through your dick

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The power to not get sun burnt when the sun's out

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The power to become real life Captain Arabian. Example: Hey nice suit, does the A on your forehead stand for America? ALALALALALALALAH! *BOOOOOOM* Moral: Next time you see someone that looks like Captain America, you better run.

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The power to fight Chuck Norris... and lose.

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The power to find spare change in the sofa

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The power to make pot legal except when there's cops around.

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The ability to spend expired coupons.

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The power to read as fast as light when you can't read

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The power to shape shift, but only into yourself two inches taller.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!