The power to think of epic jokes but only at funerals

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The power to reverse walk backwards.

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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The power to breath under water but only if you're holding your breath

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The power to open doors the opposite way they were made to open.

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The ability to police irony

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The ability to get free housing for at least 25 years after running over your neighbor.

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Vanilla scented blood

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The power to have one eyebrow!?

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The power to turn into any edible object in a restaurant.

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The power to be on mars. Not survive, not go between mars and earth. You could just instantaneously be on mars, then probably die.

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The ability to poop glue.

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The power to eat food a little faster. So when you are done you have to just stay there for 5 more minutes for everybody to finish

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The power to fly whenever you sneeze.

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The ability to fart extremely loudly every time you blink - but only when having dinnerwith your girlfriends parents for the first time.

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the power to shrink 0.1 millimeter or grow 0.1 millimeter

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Have god like powers but only on 30 of february

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The power to become tired at will but never sleep.

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The ability to laugh one's ass off.

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The power to know all the answers in the test when the test is over

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The ability to see the future through the eyes of people you don't know in places you can never go while you are doing life threatening work.

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The power to look like Stephen Hawking but have none of his intelligence.

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The ability to simultaneously implode and explode.

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The power to start typing a sentance and then start writing another way to save on your car insurance is to take the The FitnessGram™ Pacer Test is a multistage aerobic capacity test that progressively gets more difficult as it continues. The 20 meter pacer test will begin in 30 seconds. Line up at the start to write a book about a magic trick that reveals cards

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!