- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The ability to make time go ten times faster whenever you are stressed.

The power of bad luck

The power to transform your foreskin into rusty iron.

The ability to look at someone and know the exact number of times they have farted in the past year.

I'm a giant di

The power to rotten food.

The power to only sit down and not stand up.

The power to Shape shift into Bread. No consciousness of any kind, just bread, unable to change back.

the power to become Homer Simpson's mom (R.I.P. her)

The ability to shed one's skin like a snake.

the power to jump like a black guy.

the power to turn retarted

The power to fly at 0.00000000000000001mm off of the ground at a speed of 1 mile per hour whenever you desperately need the toilet.

The power to shoot several liters of blood out of you`re nose at high speed at will.

The power to get a boner whenever you see a rainbow.

The power to be invisible, when no cameras or people are looking.

The power to think of epic jokes but only at funerals

The power to teleport yourself into space without a spacesuit on

The power of fork-throwing. This includes large pie servers, spoons, and basically any other utensils that are not knives.

The power to make your nipples hurt when you twist them

The power to walk upside down but only when you're in Australia.

The power of hindsight

The power to be afraid of horses.

The power to become attractive to women. but only when your with elderly people and Sarah Palin.

Pointless Super Powers