The power to still believe in Santa Clause.

thumb_up thumb_down +48

The power to not get shit d*ck

thumb_up thumb_down +38

power to breath fire but only through your nose

thumb_up thumb_down +22

The power to piss your pants when ever a vowel is pronounced.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The power to cry sulfuric acid.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

The power to torture yourself and you are also immortal but will immediately die if you are not constantly tortured in a way that is 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 times worse then you can even imagine and are so terrified of dying that you would rather be tortured for all eternity.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

The power to live forever but only in a coma.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

The power to have no power

thumb_up thumb_down

The ability to instantly turn 360 degrees.

thumb_up thumb_down -50

Immunity to everything but AIDS, bears, being choked with cloth, Donald trump, Energy Blasts, fire, guns, etc.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

The power to not be killed by anything that can't kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down +143

The ability to think the thought you thought of is the same thought as another persons thought while thinking of that thought.

thumb_up thumb_down +135

The power of bad luck

thumb_up thumb_down +131

The ability to forget how to breathe automatically.

thumb_up thumb_down +131

the ability to command watermelons

thumb_up thumb_down +131

The ability to be in fashion.

thumb_up thumb_down +127

To get to know everything Jack Nicholson has said yet you blurb out his comments and random and by the time you face this YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: You think this entry was boring? It is great actually, what? You say it sucks? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

thumb_up thumb_down +125

The power to read any captcha, but no longer be able to type.

thumb_up thumb_down +125

The involuntary power (or rather compulsion) to add "collectors edition" to everything you ever give or sell or buy. "Old bike, but in perfect condition: Collectors edition" "Hi I am selling my body "Collectors edition" "Sadly I am allergic to my German shepherd: "Collectors edition" so I have to give it away." "Hi excuse me, where do I find the "collectors edition" Milk in this store? Eh? No any kind of "collectors edition Milk is fine" Sigh... What I mean is...

thumb_up thumb_down +117

The power to automatically blink rapidly at the rate of 1,588 times per second everytime you open your mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down +115

The superpower to attract harm to yourself with twice the damage.

thumb_up thumb_down +115

The power to not being able to go use the bathroom when you have to

thumb_up thumb_down +115

The power to ejaculate at command

thumb_up thumb_down +113

The power to dance excellently each time there is music... either you want to or not.

thumb_up thumb_down +111

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!