The power to not write pointless powers.

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The power to ejaculate at command

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The power to lift animate objects in the same direction.

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The power to shit bricks, uncontrollably.

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the power to jump like a black guy.

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The ability to speak to deaf caterpillers

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The power to convert metric to imperial

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the ability to add edges to any circle on anything that you can write on

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Vanilla scented blood

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The power to bend time and space in a way that would do nothing.

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The ability to sense every time your mom and dad are doing it even when you don't want to.

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The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

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The ability to stub your toe on every object near you when walking.

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The power to kill anyone by hitting them gently on the forehead by yelling "I HIT THIS VICTIM REALLY HARD! I AM A MURDERER HAW HAW HAW! At least 2 times before, then 3 times after the deed.

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The power to stretch infinitely, but you cant return to your normal state.

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the power to laugh at burials and cry at weddings

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The power to create a pointless superpower

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The power to turn invisible when crossing the road.

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to shoot glue from your penis

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De poverr too tipe relly shiiti annd stil bee undrstod bai rettadad peepols unly.

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The ability to stretch your arm towards an object thats in a reachable distance then clench your hand around the object and pull it to yourself.

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The power of 12% levetation

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The power to go back in time, but only as Anne Frank during the Holocaust.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!