The power to gain 400 pounds in 400 seconds.

The power to keep up with the kardashians

the power to photobomb random peoples photos without even knowing

the power to be friends with Donald trump

The ability to hear people's thoughts after they've already said them.

The power to fly really fast but only in closets.

The power to make muffins appear out of nowhere.

The power to resurrect dead insects

The power to write pointless superpowers

From this site`s standard... me typing this is a superpower, you reading this is a pointless superpower, and so is the superpower to HANDLE THE TRUTH! Moral: I still CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH! Well actually I can but I got hit with the pointless superpower below somewhere... Moral: For moral man it is better with one Moral too many than one moral too much... and if yu disagree YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

The ability to give yourself a stroke just using your mind.

The power to see in the dark, but only when the lights are on.

The ability to turn into a phone when its smash your phone season

The power to see but only with eyes????

The superpower to realize that if you guys thumb my former comment up, then it is no longer a useless "superpower" and would by itself contradict uh... itself.. by being useful... Moral: Hey, turning into Beiber at will is useful for banging silly young chicks at will is it not? And I will rather bang brainless women (beliebers yes I mean you, because everyone deserves some love) Disclaimer: Sexual age of consent is 16 over here, and good luck calling a whole nation for pedophiles, nope girls simply mature faster here... Fact: Above.

the power to look directly at the sun only if it is on the other side of the earth

The power to die on the spot and not revive

the ability to tell time without a watch

The power to take my legs off the floor while in a sitting position.

The power to levitate, but only after exactly 10 hours of sleep and you have to be wearing a tin foil bathing suit.

The Power to sh*t your food before eating it.

The immeasurable power to thumb this up all the way to the top... or even at all... I mean thumbing it down makes a lot more sense... then again this is pointless as hell ;D Richter : Hydro Storm! Rain: KSSSSHHH!!!! Dracula: Ugh agh ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh... Ahh!! Iiiiyoouu!! Play time's over, grant me powweeeeeeerrrrrraaaaaaahhh!!! Richter: Hydro Storm! Rain: KSSSSSSSSHHHH!!!!! Fire burning Dracula: Chug chug chug chug chug! Dracula: No, this cannot be!!! AAAAAAHHHH!!! Fire burning the picture: Tugshung, gshung, gshung!gh... Moral: Now I am just screwing around, I recently played an dusty old game Called Castlevania: Symphony of the night... best game ever...

The power to ejaculate needles.

T3h p0w@ T0 b3 L33T

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!