- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to make a baby stop crying for 1 second

The power to know the end of every movie ever.

The power to bounce a beach ball with lightly above-average accuracy

the power to turn everything you touch into gold......deja vu?

The power to have intense orgasms, but only if you choke yourself.

Have god like powers but only on 30 of february

The power to piss as if you were in zero gravity and leave your big piss ball floating in the bathroom.

The power to metabolize any radioactive material in your body into arsenic.

the power to travel 1-day into the future by waiting 24 hours

The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

the power to shrink 0.1 millimeter or grow 0.1 millimeter

The ability to turn your fingers into angry bears without you being able to control them

The power to turn everything you touched into gold. A-hem. Midas, you listening?

The power to breath under water, while your in a submarine.

The power to get a cold in the wintertime.

The power to fall asleep each time you

The power to poop almost instantly, but you always have the runs.

The power drown in water

the power to open doors that are unlocked

The power to be invulnerable while sleeping

the power to hate Raymond, and like Chris.

The power to surround yourself in fire, but only when you're underwater.

the ability to shoot with 0.100% accuracy

the power to defecate while standing up...

Pointless Super Powers