- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

the power to slightly darken the color of tree bark upon touch

The power to piss as if you were in zero gravity and leave your big piss ball floating in the bathroom.

The ability to cure polio, but only within U.S. borders.

The power to metabolize any radioactive material in your body into arsenic.

the power to fail at everything you do

The power to have intense orgasms, but only if you choke yourself.

The power to be the most beautiful thing ever unless someone watches you.

the power to get a random fruit every 10 days...

the power to stare at pit bulls in the eyes and imitate them

The power to fly, but only in microgravity.

The problem to spit bars like a white person with autism

the power to shrink 0.1 millimeter or grow 0.1 millimeter

the ability to do see through any girl's clothes but you must be singing a Demi Lovato song at 76.786 Decibels EXACTLY!

The power to breath under water, while your in a submarine.

The power to poop almost instantly, but you always have the runs.

the power to open doors that are unlocked

The power to gain 400 pounds in 400 seconds.

The power to hold your breath when you die

The power to be invulnerable while sleeping

The power to wiggle your big toe whenever you have a car accident with a baby gorilla on the passenger seat every other Thursday of every other leap year.

The ability to walk on your hands because your feet have nails in them.

The power to read the minds of sandwhiches.

The power to make anything money related to disappear.

the power to photobomb random peoples photos without even knowing

Pointless Super Powers