The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

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The power to be alone

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I have the power to force farts out of my ass.

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The power to look like Stephen Hawking but have none of his intelligence.

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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The power to not have a superpower

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The power to make your nipples hurt when you twist them

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The power to fly for 2 seconds when jumping

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The ability to walk on your hands because your feet have nails in them.

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The power to have everything taste like rubbing alcohol

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The power to be missed when present.

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The power to do control the atmosphere, but only in space.

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the power to never be able to draw a straight line with a ruler

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to touch your toes

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The ability to produce rainbows and yoghurt from your armpits.

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the power to get a massive headache whenever you look at toast

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The power to assassinate already-dead leaders

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The power to forget everything u learned during a test.

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The power of HONOR AND LOVE! Moral: it wont make you honorable, or lovable by the way.

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Which superpower would you rather have? 1. The ability to fly 2. Invisibility 3.The ability to make people climax sexually with your mind

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The power to change your urine to any color

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the power to ejaculate 69% of what you normally do

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An extra set of eyes...in your scrotum

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!