The power to walk at the speed of light, but not any slower.

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the power to fly but only if your feet are touching the ground

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The power to think of a perfectly good comeback three days later.

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The Power to Fail in Failing

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The power to lower your IQ at will.

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The power to not write pointless powers.

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The power to lift animate objects in the same direction.

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the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

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The power to lick any telephone pole to call somebody in the winter.

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The power to live forever, at the cost of your own life - Colleeto5

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The power to cum out of your finger tips

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The power to suck a golf ball through a garden hose

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The power to find the end of the sticky tape

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The power to impress a mentally disabled person by doing absolutely nothing

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The power to self destruct

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The power to make dead batteries appear.

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The power to have really sweaty palms.

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the power to give yourself sunburn

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The power to come up with the most funny joke ever made but forget the punch-line when ever you try to tell someone.

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The ability to have superman's powers and weaknesses, but have an 100% chance to have a suit made of indestructible kryptonite.

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The power to not respond to gravity (only when you're in space).

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the power to make plants grow at a slightly excelled rate when lying on top of them .... you also smell like shit, all the time.

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The power of becoming sick when you need it.

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The power to find anything on google. EXCEPT PORN.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!