The power to get you`re dick stuck to a huge, heavy metal bar no one can lift nor move, either you stay there till you die, or you grab a knife and...

thumb_up thumb_down +112

The power to be well feed for a day, after you eat. Dinner

thumb_up thumb_down +108

The power to make any woman fall in love with you, only when your wife is beside you.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

The power to be in any position, and still be comfortable.

thumb_up thumb_down +100

The ability to fool other drivers on the road into thinking that you are a car-sized mouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +98

The power to freeze laptops when you're watching porn and someone comes in.

thumb_up thumb_down +96

The power to convince two people I am not taking sides while simultaneously taking both sides.

thumb_up thumb_down +94

the power to take ipecac without throwing up

thumb_up thumb_down +94

The power to control paprika with your mind

thumb_up thumb_down +92

The power to regulate your body temperature at about 98 degrees at all times.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

The power to detect homosexuality in animals. ~scramjat

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The power to survive underwater, while holding your breath.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The power to smell WiFi Signals

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The power to teleport yourself into space without a spacesuit on

thumb_up thumb_down +86

The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

The power of fork-throwing. This includes large pie servers, spoons, and basically any other utensils that are not knives.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

the ability to be a super genius but can't speak or write

thumb_up thumb_down +82

the ability to levitate

thumb_up thumb_down +80

The power to gain an erection at will but only in front of your mother

thumb_up thumb_down +78

The power to hole 1 inch putts.

thumb_up thumb_down +78

The power to enhance your enemy's strength

thumb_up thumb_down +76

The ability to metamorphose into any kind of cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +76

The power to make instruments taste mayonnaise.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

The ability to die on command.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!