the ability to die on command

thumb_up thumb_down +87

The ability to stop only ONE bullet and ONE bullet only

thumb_up thumb_down +85

That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The power of having a short attention sp-- Ooh shiny!

thumb_up thumb_down +85

The power to bingewatch an entire season of a TV show in only five minutes, only to not remember any of it and have to watch it all again through normal means.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

If you shy of meeting girls in real life and find it easier on a computer and cam, you will have the power to pull 100s of girl every week local to you so go to www.sexigirls.co.uk and see the power you never knew you ever had to pull girls so fast.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The Power to make 0 dollar bills.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to open doors with your bare hands

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The ability to lose 0.000000000001 percent more skin per year.

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The ability to not drop anything ...when you're not holding anything

thumb_up thumb_down +83

Superhuman strength and endurance but only when sleeping

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The power to grow the pinky nail of your right hand

thumb_up thumb_down +83

The ability to know when, and which elevator door will open first.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The ability to produce snot twenty times faster than normal.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The power to have everything taste like rubbing alcohol

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The ability to type with your penis on your smart phone during a video chat.

thumb_up thumb_down +77

The power to cause weeds to grow twice as fast as usual in your bed of prized petunias.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The power to deconstruct molecules, but only when they're part of an object with a volume of 1 cubic millimeter.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The ability to laugh one's ass off.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

The ability to give yourself any super power, but you cannot use it if it is used.

thumb_up thumb_down +75

Invincibility, but you feel twice as much pain to everything

thumb_up thumb_down +69

the power of the home depot lisp... and as an added bonus the power of how the universe works lisp

thumb_up thumb_down +67

The power to kill anyone who is 4 seconds away from certain death

thumb_up thumb_down +65

The power to push "pull" doors

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!