The power to spit venom, but it misses 99.9% of the time.

The power to be invulnerable while sleeping

the ability to shoot with 0.100% accuracy

the power to poo out of your eyeballs and they burn when you do it

The power to think up the best lines but forget them when you try to speak

The power to journey into the future of the past.

The power to turn into a pineapple that can teleport into a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died because of a pine apple that was in a persons stomach while they're eating spaghetti with meatballs that arent meatball but instead tofuballs that are flavoured as battery acid that have been poisned with pikachu pee that pikachu drank from a pond with whale corpses that died.

the power to smell like ham

the power to pee while brushing your teeth

The power to instantaneously fall asleep but only when tomorrow is a day off.

The power to jerk off without using your hands

The ability to know who is calling without looking at caller ID

The power to think your dreams are real.

the power to teleport but it takes longer than it would to walk to your destination.

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The power to shape-shift only into a human

The power to make Thursday come before Friday and after Wednesday.

the power to be a snail when ever you think a bout snails but you CANT transform back

The power to be the best video game player ever but you have squeakers follow you everywhere calling you a hacker and saying there going to report you

The power to see via toe nails

The power of compulsive lying.

The power to feel the emotions of the dead ones

The power to become powerless

The power to realize that the alphabet does not need to be in any particular order

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!