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Quoted Coworkers
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the power to explain accidents when nobody gives a rats ass anymore
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+14
the power to breathe in space but have to be were there is gravity
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+12
The power to control time by pressing your right elbow under your right armpit
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+8
The power to turn anything into Oreos.
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-4
Being able to poop your pants at will with no control over it.
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-6
The power to never have fun...never.
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-16
The power to fly 4 inches from the ground
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-26
The power to sing wonderfully but at a pitch only dogs can hear
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-32
The power to get shot when you're alone
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-60
The ability to pass out at will.
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-62
The power to have magnetic eyeballs.
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+121
The power to jump 100 feet in the air and have bones made of glass.
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+119
The ability to not live forever
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+119
The power to pee while standing up
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+111
The power to shrink without the power to return to normal size
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+109
The power to be an amazing playing instruments, but die if you touch any instruments.
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+105
to be able to eat candybars and spit out diabetes
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+105
The power to type random pointless powers on a website for pointless powers.
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+101
I'm a giant di
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+99
The power to read this text unless you can see it.
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+97
The power to recharge batteries by licking them.
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+95
The power to open jam jar lids, however stuck they are.
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+93
The ability to write a pointless superpower, which was posted earlier without having read it.
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+93
The ability to eat your self up when out of food.
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+89
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Pointless Super Powers
A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!