The ability to create bruises on your body but not know where they came from, and then poke them.-.Jack

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The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

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The power to have a photogenic memory (You look really good in every memory of yourself)

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The power to fire lasers from my nipples.

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To fly.. into the zone.."Friend zone"

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The power to run at the average speed of a normal person running.

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the power to get a random fruit every 10 days...

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The power to give yourself a staticshock, every time you touch yourself.

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Absolute Defeatability- the power to be defeated by any and all things physical and nonphysiological.

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The power of HONOR AND LOVE! Moral: it wont make you honorable, or lovable by the way.

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the power to misspell

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the power to see everything as if it were a 1 year olds dralling.

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The power to walk through air.

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Super Arians. Moral: If you think of it, Super Sayan is an acronym for Super Asian, are blonde blue eyed Asians superiors? DRAGON BALL JAPANAZEE!

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the power to spit long distances at inconvenient times

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The power to Rage Against The Machine

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The power to see 1 plank length farther then most normal people

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Super strength that works for a millisecond.

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The power to do nothing at all without getting bored or tired.

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The power to see through glass

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The power to ejaculate needles.

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The power to remove your foreskin at any given time

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Power that makes you perfect in being useless

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To the comment below: You wont get a chance to miss me mortal... Moral: The color of envy... you wish you could be like me... everyone of you, yet some of you got the balls/pussies to prove it! For the people! For the freedom of speech! For courage and strength! For balls of steel! For the ladies... and most importantly... because I f*cking want to! NOW AND FOREVER! I AM MORAL MAN!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!