The ability to quit smoking by giving yourself lung, heart, and throat cancer, coupled with enphysema.

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The ability to think why does it say write your own when you type it.

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the ability to un-dank any meme

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The power to break a Nokia

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The power to teleport in the bottom of the sea.

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The power of having a bulletproof appendix.

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The power to have a godlike super human strength but it only activates during a REM sleep cycle.

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The ability to find the sharpest object in an given drawer, by having it puncture your hand. Every time.

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the power to turn retarted

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The power to see oxygen.

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The power to kill yourself.

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The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

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The power to be immortal until the moment that you would die.

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The ability to talk to anybody in the world, as long as they are within your eyesight.

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The power to turn Dollars into Pennies

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The power to read terms and conditions

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The ability to walk backwards... backwards.

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The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

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the power to time travel to the same time, date, and year

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the passive ability to teleport to the center of the world every tenth of a second

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The power to heal but every time you heal your leg or arm falls off.

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The power to make a rather pointless comeback here... Moral: See what I mean? ;),

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The power to run half as fast as whoever is chasing you.

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The power of becoming an apple tree

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!