The power to become encased in concrete at will.

The power to be oppressed by everything

to be able to eat candybars and spit out diabetes

The power to become a laptop forever!

The power to see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch

the power to convert oxygen and glucose to water and carbon dioxide every time you breathe.

The power to speak in only anime openings

The power to make lipstick fly

The power to be french.

75% levitation

The ability too shit out calculators every 10 seconds.

The power to speak only in hashtags. #awkward

The ability to read people's thoughts but only in a language that you do not understand.

The power to defeat Chuck Norris but only if you can reach the speed of light

the ability to un-dank any meme

The power to blow up, before a bomb next to you blows up.

The power to break a Nokia

The ability to have superman's powers and weaknesses, but have an 100% chance to have a suit made of indestructible kryptonite.

The power to die,but only if your alive!

The ability to find the sharpest object in an given drawer, by having it puncture your hand. Every time.

The power to turn your current clothes inivisible

The power of women's rights.

The "helpers" you call during emergencies when they where new and a itsy bit unorganized... misunderstandings easily showed up part 1: The Firemen: Why the hell did you call us if this place is already on fire? Call the damn Watermen THEN! The Watermen: Sorry we only receive calls and help people that are drowning, try the Firemen or something... The Cops: Crime in the city? Sorry our work is to COP OUT of stuff, Try the Police or something...

the power to gain the intelligents of forest gump, but not the table tennis playing ability

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!