The power to die from darting too hard

The power to become retarded but your so stupid you forget how to turn it off

The power to shit diamonds, but only into magical underwear that turn diamonds into shit.

The power to unsee the unseen.

The power to be the most amazing singer in the world, but only when nobody can hear you.

The ability to run faster than the speed of sound, but only when laying down.

The ability to talk to bacteria

Power To Throw Power Booger In Every 5 Seconds

The power to have a %90 chance of dying every single second.

The power to get shot when you're alone

The power to make someone hate crayons by poking your left eyebrow while looking at them.

The ability to abruptly end conversations.

The power to eat food, unless you're touching food.

The Power To Fly Without control

The power to jump 1 inch higher than the typical person.

The power of christ ;)

YOU CAN WISH BUT IT WILL NOT COME TRUE -.-

THE SUPER FRIENDS HEROES LEAGUE OF SUPER HEROES OF LESSER USEFUL HEROES! KNIGHT FARTSALOT!: Fear my methane! You and me in one small room for 3 days and you will faint for sure! Uncle Diabeetush: Save their parents Captain! Ill take care of their children! Captain Novolin: I have great sugar level control! Help me! Evil Mistress Sugarpie is too sweet! Runald MagnifiCient Donalds: HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR HAMBARGAR WOOOOO! I keep American people from starvation! Remember kids less than 250 pounds counts as starvation! And their LEADER... MORAL MAN!: The hell am I introducing myself here for? Damn you Subconscious! How can you expect people to understand my genius of putting myself here! They are morons! Oh... hi everybody.. wazzup?

Super speed, but with super clumsiness

the power to turn a dollar into 99 cents

The power to have all of your genes inherited from your parents

The power to be oppressed by everything

The power to grow a mustache with your pubic hair

The power to survive extreme temperatures, for extremely short amounts of time.

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!