The power the fly unless your alive. The power to swim in water unless your wet.

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The power to fly at 0.00000000000000001mm off of the ground at a speed of 1 mile per hour whenever you desperately need the toilet.

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The power to have omniscience but can't speak and have Alzheimer's.

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The power to stop moral man from writing morals under every comment... Moral: The damn CIA cant go trough my battlestation, because I use this computer via proxy and can change my IP at will, so you literally would have to blow up the anti-bomb shelters in Micronesia and thus kill a key element of the pirate bay... And who would want that... buy your own music and movies? Download your own games? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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The power to think of pointless powers.

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the ability to invent cheese and toast

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The power to watch Netflix instead of writing a thesis paper.

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The ability to have telekinesis on February the 30th

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The power to run Crysis.

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The power to be first on any form of media (youtube powers).

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the power to extend commercial time while your in the bathroom

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The ability to replace your DNA with parmesan cheese.

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The power to only be able to eat poop

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the ability to un-dank any meme

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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The power to smell feces from a mile away.

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The ability to hear the opinions of inanimate objects.

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The power to teleport massive objects one inch above your head.

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The power to blame it on the Boogie

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The power to eat sandwiches and never get full

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The power to go back in time one second at a time, but the ability takes one second to recharge.

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The power to know everything, but then forget every 7 seconds

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The power get everyone's attention by jerking off in public

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The power to die every time you are standing on something.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!