The power to jump 1 inch higher than the typical person.

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The power to become a frog when a snake sees you

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The power to make a white paper green but only with a colored pencil

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The power to look at someone and imaginatively initiate intercourse in the most unreasonable way possible.

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The power to steal other peoples powers but being the only person in the world with super powers.

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The power to have all of your genes inherited from your parents

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The power to get you`re dick stuck to a huge, heavy metal bar no one can lift nor move, either you stay there till you die, or you grab a knife and...

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The power to be oppressed by everything

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The power to have bought Wi-Fi, without any pc or cellphone to use it.

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the power to get wider by eating junk food

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The ability to have A's in all your classes, but only if you already have A's in all your classes.

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The power to communicate with dust bunnies.

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Eclairvoiance: The ability to forsee when you will eat your next cream-filled, chocolate coated pastry...

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The power to see through windows

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The power to stop moral man from writing morals under every comment... Moral: The damn CIA cant go trough my battlestation, because I use this computer via proxy and can change my IP at will, so you literally would have to blow up the anti-bomb shelters in Micronesia and thus kill a key element of the pirate bay... And who would want that... buy your own music and movies? Download your own games? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

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The power to fall down stairs sooner than you should have.

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The power to watch Netflix instead of writing a thesis paper.

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The power to divide by zero

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The power to not respond to gravity (only when you're in space).

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The power to stop a bullet from hitting someone you care about, once.

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The power to be first on any form of media (youtube powers).

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The power to shoot liqiud gold ever 3-6 years only when you come across jesus.

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the power to turn into celebs that evryonr loves to write about only infront of 1 million people

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That F-ucking ass hole that keeps typing morals all the time, he is F`n annoying! Moral: You thought I was a hater eh? Hahaha got you there ;) And if that is not the most pointless pointlessity in the world, then... I give shit about thumbs ups really, they just discovered that I have an bad allergy to dust, and thus I have been unable to work out for TWO YEARS! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Me so happy, me love you long time. That is what women usually say to me, instead that they change the happy with horny... and replace you with someone else`s name. Self Irony... such a delight... and maybe I am lying... who knows... who wants to know? Nobody? :( sob... excellent! :D Damn CATCHPHRA! I SWEAR I USED TO HAVE A KITTEN THAT WAS TWICE THE SIZE OF TEXAS!

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!