The power to fly at 0.00000000000000001mm off of the ground at a speed of 1 mile per hour whenever you desperately need the toilet.

thumb_up thumb_down +98

The power to have omniscience but can't speak and have Alzheimer's.

thumb_up thumb_down +98

The power to stop moral man from writing morals under every comment... Moral: The damn CIA cant go trough my battlestation, because I use this computer via proxy and can change my IP at will, so you literally would have to blow up the anti-bomb shelters in Micronesia and thus kill a key element of the pirate bay... And who would want that... buy your own music and movies? Download your own games? YOU THINK YOU HAVE THAT LUXURY? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

thumb_up thumb_down +94

the power to see though a door.......................................only if its open

thumb_up thumb_down +94

Ability to emit soap from your ears in the sun

thumb_up thumb_down +92

The power to turn brass into gold, but only when the brass is made of gold.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

The power to not constantly thumb my comments up or down, whichever. Moral: Energy spent on me, is energy well spent! Stay proud and walk tall soldier!

thumb_up thumb_down +90

The power to think of pointless powers.

thumb_up thumb_down +90

the power to make plants grow at a slightly excelled rate when lying on top of them .... you also smell like shit, all the time.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The ability to have telekinesis on February the 30th

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The power to run Crysis.

thumb_up thumb_down +88

The power to turn Justin Bieber into a cat and kill him 9 times

thumb_up thumb_down +86

The power to be first on any form of media (youtube powers).

thumb_up thumb_down +86

the power to extend commercial time while your in the bathroom

thumb_up thumb_down +86

The power to play a snippet of Darude-Sandstorm whenever you inhale or exhale.

thumb_up thumb_down +84

The power to only be able to eat poop

thumb_up thumb_down +84

The ability to replace your DNA with parmesan cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +84

The power to smell feces from a mile away.

thumb_up thumb_down +82

The power to revive anyone....But only if they are alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

Liam Brudenell

thumb_up thumb_down +80

The power to turn 85 in 85 years.

thumb_up thumb_down +80

The power to eat 2 hotdogs in the same bun

thumb_up thumb_down +78

To fly.. into the zone.."Friend zone"

thumb_up thumb_down +76

the power of super intelligence to go to college and actually expect a job these days.

thumb_up thumb_down +76

Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!