The power to fold paper seven times

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The ability to lift things up and put them down.

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The power to magically generate drugs in your pockets, but only while being arrested or in a police station.

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lol

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The ability to teleport 1 Planck length in any direction you want

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The power to turn delicious and tasteful food into useless brown mush.

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The power to have all pointless superpowers, but only on the 12th and or 13th on january on a year that isn't 2015 or lower, but you have to be wearing nothing but purple underwear and a skanky hat.

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The ability to stretch your arm towards an object thats in a reachable distance then clench your hand around the object and pull it to yourself.

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The power to uncontrollably say "thats what she said" whenever it is possible, even if its really shitty

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I’M JUST HAVING AN ALLERGIC REACTION TO THE UNIVERSE. Via: Collection of Love WhatsApp Status

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The power to shoot money out of your hands, but only when your body is on fire.

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The power to tolerate Justin Bieber.

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The power to eat food, but as you eat the food you turn into a giant green monster and have to terrorize Japan for the rest of your life. As a result of you terrorizing Japan, McDonald's comes out with monster toys and Universal does a children's movie about how monsters can be cute cuddly creatures in order to calm down those who are having nightmares at night because of your horrific actions in Japan. While in Japan though a mad scientist creates a unmosterification ray gun that heals you. Then you decide you have to go on an all liquid diet so over the course of many years you become impervious to drowning, in that time you also develop the ability to speak with sea animals with a sonar type ability. Thus rendering you as Aquaman the most useless superhero ever.

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The power to turn into wood once you go inside a wood chipper.

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the power of running at superspeed, whenever you are sat down

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The power to turn water into wine.

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The power to get this. Do you get it?

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The power to eat anything, but always vomit 15 minutes later.

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The ability to be heard in space

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The power to (involuntarily) duplicate someone's wounds or illnesses by touching them.

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The power of fart only in front of cheerleaders

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the power to be a snail when ever you think a bout snails but you CANT transform back

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The power to grow nipples all over your body at will

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the power to give your mom amazing orgasms by doing her analy

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!