- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to smell feces from a mile away.

to walk 5 miles at 0.0000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000001 miles per hour

The power get everyone's attention by jerking off in public

The ability to see the future through the eyes of people you don't know in places you can never go while you are doing life threatening work.

The ability to judge a book by its cover.

The power to completely understand Monty Python sketches.

The power to see why kids love cinnamon toast crunch

The power to barf up a narwhal, but only on Wednesdays.

the power to perminately bring jade goody back from the dead

The power to see out of the back of your head but never the front

The power to jump several thousand feet in the air, without the power to survive the impact of landing

the power to burn your school down from napalm farts.

The power to kill someone with a knife

The power to fly inside of airplanes

the power to fly but only 5 feet off the ground and at walking speed.

The power to speak any language except the language of your people.

The power to handle the truth. Moral: Because with the exception of a few good men... YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!

The power to eat the same food but you have to throw it up first.

the passive ability to teleport to the center of the world every tenth of a second

The power to be invisible when no one is looking at you!

the power to animate condiments

BULLET ATTRACTION.

The power to lose body parts by merely thinking about losing said parts coupled together with worry. I.e. I hope I don't lose my testicles.... Damn-it!!

The power to read this.

Pointless Super Powers