The power to walk at the speed of light, but not any slower.

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The ability to fart and pee twice in one go.

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The power to stop time for all living beings in the world, including yourself, and starting it again at the same time as the time would have been if you didn't stop it.

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The power to be immune to any type of radiation, unless it has something from the periodic table.

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The power to control karma. Moral: Karma is a BlTCH! MY BlTCH!

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The power to be normal and average

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The power to unscramble an egg, but only after you've eaten it.

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The ability to count to potato

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The power to breathe through your mouth when you have a stuffy nose

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The power to look into the car next to me at the exact moment the driver is picking his nose

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the power to read your own mind the power of 75% levitation the power of turning into a juicy pork chop in the presence of a lion the power to believe it is butter the power to turn into a blender once and never change back the power to cry acid the power of turning highly visable while trying to sneak the power to speak, sneeze and cough really loudly and annoyingly the power to teleport half of your body the power to age extremely fast the power to have the patience to write this the power to read all of these d pwer 2 rite stupeedlee the power to thumbs down this (it also makes you look stupid) the power to only speek in sarcasm the power to see the past (not the future) emit eht lla sdrawkcab etirw ot rewop eht

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The ability to face reality after reading all the pointless powers

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the power to yell a math problem at will

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The ability to read your own mind

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the power to be super ugly

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The power to make pencils dull.

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the power to dissaper into nothingness and appear in 2 years again while not noticing you skipped time...

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X-Ray vision that only works on fat chicks.

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The power to shit without squinting.

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The power to make Dylan Zona trip on everything when he walks and falls face first I to a pile of shit

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The ability to teleport to the Taj Mahal whenever you want ONLY the Taj Mahal

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The power to digest food wrappers, but only once youve opened them.

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The power to walk on water... but drown in land.

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To be ALMOST able to run faster than a speeding bullet

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!