The power to turn into a magikarp

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The ability to have 99 problems without one of them being a female

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The power to run like Nicolas Cage.

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the power to put your shoes on faster than you did before

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The power to not finish your....

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the power to get sick

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The power to have a device to turn the tv off without touching it!!! :O

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The ability to look directly at the sun without damaging your eyes.

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The power to lose body parts by merely thinking about losing said parts coupled together with worry. I.e. I hope I don't lose my testicles.... Damn-it!!

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The power to drive a car, but only once you've passed your driver's license.

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The ability to teleport 1 Planck length in any direction you want

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The ability to eat fruit cake without gagging.

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The ability to swim in water.

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the power to feel pain whenever you breathe

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The power to create another human

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the power to disinfect wigs.

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The power to think that you can fly when you wear a cape.

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the power to spawn goosebumps when ever you want

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The power to get cancer all the time. And strokes.

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The power to serve the Lord Dog.

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The power to take a crap.

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The power to have bought Wi-Fi, without any pc or cellphone to use it.

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the power to kill someone if you shoot them in the heart

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the power to enter this website into your favorites page, so you can look up other pointless super powers in times of danger

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!