- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The power to knock yourself unconscious

The ability to have superman's powers and weaknesses, but have an 100% chance to have a suit made of indestructible kryptonite.

The power to open jam jar lids, however stuck they are.

The power to time travel two seconds into the future.

The power to type a power on this website and see it's already taken.

The power to shoot projectiles from your eyes to the inside of your head.

The power to grow bigger, but never smaller.

The power to be invisible, but only when no one's looking.

The power to walk 1% faster.

The power to deconstruct molecules, but only when they're part of an object with a volume of 1 cubic millimeter.

The ability to talk to anybody in the world, as long as they are within your eyesight.

The power to finish right before you start (If you know what I mean)

The power to get arrested

The power to make it impossible to have powers

The power to remove cancer from stroke victim's bodies.

The power to turn a light on with your mind, but only if the light is already on

The ability to metamorphose into any kind of cheese

The ability to be telepathic but only while sleeping. So you just think it's a dream.

The power to be so fast, that if you sprint forward you travel the whole world just in time to fuck yourself.

The power to not be funny

The power to read terms and conditions

The power of measuring grains of corn from a large distance.

The power to turn any object into food

To be able to immediately know the name of anything you see

Pointless Super Powers