The power to turn into a magikarp

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The power to be invisible when no one is looking at you!

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The power to jump over any fence no matter how high! Good luck surviving the fall.

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The power to be a common person

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The power to hear in the dark.

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The power to have 99 problems, except your dog... if she is female.

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The power to change into an Arab at will. Moral: Will not work inside arab-countries.

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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the power to have access to unlimited porn but your parents never leave the room

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The power of dying whenever you want.

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To be able to cut paper by doing the scissor action with your fingers.

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The power to die from darting too hard

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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The ability to spontaneously get drunk, but only when writing your exams

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the power to be a free wireless hotspot only when you are completely motionless.

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The power to convert any font to comic sans at will.

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The ability to know the current mood of your doppleganger.

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The power to be any animal you want, but only if you are that specific animal that you want to be.

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The power to control any O-shaped piece of metal.

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The power to recite all of Encyclopedia Brown's cases in alphabetical order.

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The power to .... Make pointless superpowers! :D

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The ability to irreversibly turn into a turkey days before thanksgiving.

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the power to concentrate all the oil and grease in your body into one mega zit that you can pop at people, and possibly use as a propulsion system....if oily enough

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The power of extreme superstrenght, you scratch you`re nuts and planet earth explodes from the vibrations.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!