The power to make up pointless superpowers

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The Power To Only Get Horny Around Your Grandmother

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The power to teleport all gold to criminals and or teleport criminals to gold

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The power to tell when someone last masturbated, but only by shaking their hand.

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The power to become a forensic paranoiac raving lunatic at will... HEY! YOU! Why are you gonna give my comment a thumbs down eh? AND WHY A THUMBS UP? Are you gonna hack my account and kill my family? OH YEAH! OH YEAH? I AM GONNA KILL THEM MYSELF JUST TO TAKE IT AWAY FROM YOU! BAHAHAHAHA!

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the power to be forever alone

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The power to commit geniocide but only of you own race

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the power of turn yourself into a mexican

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The power to become encased in concrete at will.

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the ability to run as fast as you want but never be able to slow down...

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The power to clap 14 times a second

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The power to increase you`re pain at will.

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The power to ejaculate laser beams.

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The power to be able to teleport through a random fat man's colon.

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the ability to predict the winning lottery numbers in a completely random order

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the power to summon rick astley whenever you want to, but only when you're the only one in the room, so only you can hear him

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the power to eat anything edible but not if it's edible.

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the ability to constantly have the fever

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The power to be black, but only if you are at a KKK meeting

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The power to make money disappear.

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the power to Shoop Da whoop out of your bum hole

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The power to balance the light switch in the middle but only on the 4th try.

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The power to run really fast, but only when facing brick walls 2 ft away.

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The ability to go forward in time at will.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!