The power to have extreme S and M sex with Rosie O Donnell at will, you as the submissive.

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to randomly self destruct at any time

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The power to think of witty comebacks 3 days too late

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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the ability to turn off your super ability.....

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The power uncontrollably self destruct when you feel safe.

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the power to randomly die at any moment

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The power to spit so hard and fast that you hit yourself in the back of the head every time... and it can only be used once, because its so hard it goes trough everything...(thus hits you in the skull duh) including your skull... Moral: Remember kids! Protect, Serve and Survive, and ask your mommy and daddy why they make the sexytime... their response may be pretty interesting...

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The power to stand up and do what's right, save people, restore order, preserve life, maintain balance and create peace but the lack of motivation to do so.

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the power to summon a massive midget

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being allergic to dairy and soy

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To be able to immediately know the name of anything you see

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the power to turn yourself into a toaster. once,

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The power to feel like you're gonna sneeze forever

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The power to no sweat in the cold.

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the power to hear everything in sign language and see everything in braille

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The power to have a great singing voice, but only in the shower,

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The power to jerk off without using your hands

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The power to transform every book, note or image on the television into illegal child porn simply by being near them.

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Being able to transform into anything on and off the planet, only, you have to be touching that object.

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the power to slitely change how you look by smiling

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The power of having all of Batman`s Superpowers.

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The power to die.

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The power of self-propelled flight, but only when you're the President of the United States.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!