The power to fly, but only when you are less than a foot off the ground.

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Tha ability to not be able to fly

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Immunity to curable diseases.

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The power to make anyone you see look surprise.

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The power to play all Videogames you want, but you have to pay the original price for them.

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The power grow arm pit hair 5 times faster and 5 times longer than it was after shaving.

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The power to punch anyone as hard as you want but get hit with the same force in your genitals

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The ability to get up early for school, but only on weekends.

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The power to talk to plants but only when they have mean things to say.

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The power to be better than Chuck Norris, but you have to be in a lucid sleep.

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the power to get somewere at the same time that you arrive.

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the power to pay 1 cent less then what items in the store cost

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The power to walk on water mixed with cornstarch and cesium.

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To be able to immediately know the name of anything you see

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The power to change into an Arab at will. Moral: Will not work inside arab-countries.

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the power to change people socks on command

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The power to know what someone thought, after they told you.

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The ability to catch bullets traveling under 5 mph

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The power to open any trash can lid with telekinesis if its within view.

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The amazing ability to shoot any liquid substance out of your eyes, with a requirement being you must douse your eyes with the substance beforehand.

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The power to fly, but only fly north

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The power to do unto others as you do unto yourself

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The power to take perfectly timed photos when nothing interesting is going on.

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Most of God`s powers. One: He has existed eternally, and one day he said: LET THERE BE LIGHT! Uh... so he has lived eternal eternities in the dark? Explains his shitty mood... Two: Speaking about let there be light... the very first sentence he utters is wrong, because "First God created light".... And then he went "oops" and time traveled back in time to create voice first so he could say anything? Three: He sent his son to combat sin... how powerful is sin? So powerful that a so called omnipotent being had to sacrifice his son? And what sacrifice is it to have your immortal son killed just to prove that he is immortal? Sounds like a guy being sawed in half and then coming out whole... TADAH! (applause from the audience). So in the end he sacrificed... nothing? He died to prove he could not die? Moral: Jesus: Epic troll..

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!