Super strength that works for a millisecond.

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The power to talk to animals but only as they are attacking you

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The power to turn into wood once you go inside a wood chipper.

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The power to be the only homosexual in a house of 5 other people who are there for sex.

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The power to have tastebuds inside your ass.

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the power to put paper to your nose and blow strange liqeud type substance into it.

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the power to pee for longer then a normal person

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The power to fart tear gas

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The power to make any woman sleep with you. but works only on dead ones.

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The power to be superman with no power's

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The power to stay dry in the rain, while indoors.

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The power to remember the funniest thing in the world and have a full on laughing fit, as long as you are at a funeral.

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The power to perform incredible feats of strength and speed but only while on an elevator.

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The power to yell WOW THOSE ARE SOME GIANT MELONS LADY! And have her blush and giggle, as your girlfriend grabs you and kisses you, just to make sure to "balloon lady" that you are not on the free market. Moral: And you think I act unusual here... Hah! That is simply because you lack the ability to love... the most important person in your life, the one that will take care of your beloved ones, the one that will inspire his friends... Yourself... sadly we are in a time period where being a modest emo is in... Well, I am out! Out there, being free!

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The power to become the best player in every Moral Kombat game there is. Test your Morals... TSHHH, test your morals TSHHH MORAL KOMBAT! Mortal: FEAR THE WRATH OF MORAL KAHN!

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The power to have knowledge of your power.

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Be dumb and gay like austin Calhoun

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The power to light glue on fire.

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the power to win any shit eating contest.

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The power to cause slow people in front of you in the corridor to walk 3% faster

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The power to laugh in Japanese.

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The power to walk at the speed of light, but not any slower.

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the power to turn into toilet paper but not back

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The power to occasionally mistake your hand for a bear.

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!