The ability to avoid work when connected to the internet. Thanks, by the way.

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The ability to shoot a banana from your eyebrow every time you are riding on a unicycle.

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The power to turn grow a vagina that can whistle on your neck during a full moon.

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the power to wake up 2 seconds before your alarm.

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to eat a pie and get to fart an apple (cus why not)

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the power to predict the outcome of any event after it's already happened

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The power to hole 1 inch putts.

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Astral Projection. Distance: .3mm

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The ability to read. No wait that is actually helpful. Never mind.

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The ability to type incredibly fast when your keyboard is broken.

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The power to make anyone you see look surprise.

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The ability to get shot, for real.

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The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

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The power to have 50%-78% water in your body

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I HAVE A TINY PINGAS! (Penis) Moral: Ladyfriend here daring me to post this here, PFF! Is that even a dare? I got balls of steel! Oh, and I should totally ask my doctor if she can give me something that helps me unwind after multiple female company, or at least they are daring me all to type that pff! Im not even good looking... And noooooo, nobody dared me to type that, they want todeeeeeeeeeellllllllteeeeeeeeee tht BUTI SHALLOOOWWWWWWINSSSSSSSS

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The power to see why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch

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The power to touch the ground using only your feet

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The power to whant badly to have kids but you give birth to massive amounts of spiders, ducklings and some undefined type of small feline instead of childen

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The power to have your mother suck your dick dry as long as there is any sperm in your balls.

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The ability to look at someone and die.

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You know what they say! The power to make all toasters... Toast Toast!

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The power to make remotes invisible

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The power of measuring grains of corn from a large distance.

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the power to change people socks on command

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!