- Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!

The ability to cut your stool in to tiny pieces smaller than a pea

The power to speed up time moments before you are about to die.

The power to teleport but you must have walked to that place within the last attosecond

The power to implode when you have pee and you can't stop

The power to have everything taste like rubbing alcohol

The power to instantly tun any kind of meat into hotdogs.

The power to turn shades of brown or red, but only when exposed to the sun for an extended amount of time.

The power to understand irony.

the power to fly but only 5 feet off the ground and at walking speed.

The ability to pull Bleach Flavored lighter fluid out of your ass every time you see a modern feminist or a Jacob Satorious video

The ability to type with your penis on your smart phone during a video chat.

The power to pick your nose but you happen to be Lord Voldermot

The power to enter a car, but only if the car is out of gas.

The power to be able to see 1 second into the future

The power to write pointless superpowers

The ability to break every bone in your body every second, then have super speed. You wouldn't be able to run.

The power to eat the same food but you have to throw it up first.

The ability to fly, but only when there's no gravity.

the power to spit long distances at inconvenient times

The power to eat pop-tarts as soon as they pop out of the toaster

the power to become phil collins, but only after peter gabrial left

the power to write about pointless super powers in universes that nothing exists.

The power to burn the sun.

Power that makes you perfect in being useless

Pointless Super Powers