The power to never be surprised when the toaster goes off.

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The power to revive anyone....But only if they are alive.

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The power to hear what is happening to objects (such as a bed).

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The power of knowing every fact about dolphins

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The power to have an indestructible tongue.

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The power to read the future in a language you will never learn to understand. Moral: I read that "thy comment expects a billion red thumbs"... WTF does that mean?

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The power of self mind control

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The power to be a woman

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The power to barf up a narwhal, but only on Wednesdays.

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The power to finger some one in the arse so they shit them self.

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The power to sound like a 12 year old while playing call of duty

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The power to be mario for 10 seconds then you vomit shit for 17 hours. this happens every week.

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Every time you clap some one dies

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The superpower to get your comment in the tops because you mistyped "the pewer to type backwards" backwards. Its a funny story actually, you people liked it so much that it skyrocketed past the correctly spelled ones and turned out top.. 40 or something? I am being modest here... just go into the popular sections and take a look. I would have told you it was me who wrote that super pewer but you would not really believe me would you? By the way thanks, it made me laugh, and I hope that is the same reason you thumbed it up, you people are awesome! Moral: It was me. (I mistyped the word mistyped itself which is grammatically incorrect by itself, now beam me up Scotty!)

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The ability to know what time it is when looking at a working clock.

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to create balloons out of anywhere on your body, and twist them into whatever you look at.

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The power to drown on land.

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The power to say things twice. The power to say things twice.

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The power to do control the atmosphere, but only in space.

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The power to deconstruct molecules, but only when they're part of an object with a volume of 1 cubic millimeter.

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The power to shit yourself on a really hot day with no change of underwear

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The power to hear a "SSSSSSSS" sound, then be blown up.

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The capability to draw penises very well

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----the power to hold your breath until your die-----

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Pointless Super Powers

A pointless super power is a supernatural ability that has no practical value. The humor is in the fact that you would be better of without that special ability. Enjoy this funny collection of pointless superpowers and write you own!